Mental Health Awareness

May 18, 2023

May is Mental Health Awareness month. You figure, if an entire month is dedicated to a cause, then it must be pretty important. Mental health is paramount to the overall health of human beings. We will often use the sayings, “Mind over matter, or “If you think it, or dream it, you can do it, or be it.” It all begins with the mindset. What we feed our bodies affects our physical outcomes; in the same way, what we pour into our minds, influences our thoughts and actions. Identifying the positive and negative factors in our lives can help reorient how we spend our time, and who we spend it with.


Positive interactions.


Humans are designed to live in community with one another. Whether introverted or extroverted, people will often gravitate towards those who build them up and contribute to their well-being in a meaningful way. Isolation, on the other hand, is often viewed negatively, such as in the context of an isolated elderly person or single mother living alone with her children. Some exclusions may include fans of Henry David Thoreau, or persons seeking solitude in extreme nature who are content to be alone and prefer it that way. Whichever type of person you are, it is important to surround yourself with people who support you and create a positive influence in your life.


Our social encounters can have a major impact on our mental health. For those who believe in a higher power, mental and spiritual health are often intertwined. An example would be a follower of Jesus Christ, who, by being around others that share their doctrinal beliefs and faith, are both edified and encouraged to grow deeper within their convictions. Spending time with people who have shared interests can also help improve one’s talents and hobbies, such as art, music, and sports. Make a mental or literal note of the people you surround yourself with. Do they encourage and uplift your spirits? Or do they speak negatively and give counsel that is contrary to what you believe? This isn’t to say opposition to your beliefs is bad, because challenges can produce both resilience and confirmation of beliefs. However, for long-term exposure, a safe place of like-minded individuals creates a fostering environment instead of living in a constant state of defense or offense with your companions.


Disconnect and reconnect.


Living in a digital age where we fill our virtual calendars to the brim, we often find ourselves with little-to-no time for quietness and being still. A shift needs to occur where we make the time for personal development and mental health rather than hoping we will have enough time left over each day to achieve the things we want. If health changes are a priority, such as walking more, but there is no time left in your schedule to do this, then you are not setting yourself up for success. Limiting digital screen time, such as watching videos or TV, going on social media, etc., will free up more time to be present in your surroundings. Reading is a great way to focus your attention and tune out white noise distractions. Not into books? A quiet rest may be just what you need. Oh, you have trouble sitting still? Scroll down.


Spending time in nature.


Studies have shown that time in green spaces can significantly improve your mental health and overall performance. In the article “Nurtured by Nature,” the American Psychological Association (APA) says spending time in nature can act as a balm for our busy brains and interacting with nature has cognitive benefits. Being in the great outdoors can decrease stress and improve retention. It’s beneficial to take a break in between tasks to go outside and enjoy the simplicity and peacefulness of nature, then return indoors feeling refreshed and ready to resume your work with vigor! Small excursions into nature are enough to reset the mind – no intense mountain climbing or expedition hiking required!


On the move.


Do yourself a favor and get moving. Not everyone was born to run a marathon or compete in the National Olympics. We’re talking baby steps here. If you are sedentary, sitting for many hours a day, try standing for a few minutes a day. If you are able to walk, increase your steps and take time to move your body for 30 minutes. Routine exercise significantly improves both mental and physical health. Making exercise a habit and a priority will have both short-term and long-term benefits. Daily walks will improve stamina and improve mental health by alleviating some stressors from the day. Long-term physical health will be improved by maintaining muscle tone, weight loss, and blood flow circulation, which can improve cardiovascular health. Adding a walking partner may be helpful for some, while others may enjoy the solitude of a solo walk or run, listening to the sounds of nature, music, or focusing on the sound of their breathing. Whatever pace and style works for you, do that.


Journaling and reflecting.


Disconnecting from the demands of the day and reflecting on one’s thoughts is a good way to unwind and refocus our energy toward our priorities. Writing down thoughts, concerns, and future tasks, can help take the pressure off your brain. Write down simple goals, actions that you are doing to achieve those goals, and routinely reevaluate how things are going. Also, how are you feeling? Have your priorities or goals changed? Create a new goal with objectives to reach it. If you find that you are consistently not meeting your goals or changing goals halfway through, make sure the goals you are setting are reasonably achievable. Set smaller goals, if needed.


Stress is a part of life. But, if you find yourself unable to cope with daily stressors, or emotions of anxiety, or depression, it may be time to seek professional mental health help.


AbbaCare is a nonprofit Pregnancy Resource Center currently serving in the Winchester, VA and Martinsburg, WV areas. When making any decision, it is important to know the facts. If you or someone you know is facing an unplanned, or unexpectedly difficult, pregnancy and would like to learn more about our services, please contact us here or by calling 540.665.9660 in Winchester or 304.726.6582 in Martinsburg.

A woman is holding a baby and kissing it on the cheek.

Embrace Grace: Providing Support and Community for Single and Pregnant Women

October 14, 2024
Women all over the nation are finding out they are pregnant and they feel completely alone. They look to abortion as the answer because of fear of the unknown. Fear can feel overwhelming and many women feel pressure to make a quick decision. They don’t know where to turn and they think their life and dreams are over.
A woman is sitting at a table using a laptop computer.

Can I Continue My Pregnancy After Taking the Abortion Pill?

September 24, 2024
Making a major decision can be stressful. Sometimes, people think that just picking an option will provide clarity. But what if you change your mind? Is it possible to go back?
A man and a woman are touching their foreheads on the beach.

Healthy relationships: What they are and what they are not.

August 8, 2024
Relationships can be amazing and fun or challenging and difficult. Both people in the relationship have value and worth and deserve to be treated well by their partner. It takes both people working together to have a healthy relationship. A Healthy Relationship: Respects the others opinions, beliefs and boundaries Actively listens to the other person to gain understanding not just to form a response. Is kind and treats the other person the way they want to be treated Is honest and truthful in all situations- no “white” lies Understands and is able to empathize when the other is going through a difficult time Perseveres standing strong together in tough times Protects Trusts to do things independently as well as together Gives, being able to compromise An Unhealthy Relationship: Jealous does not trus Possessive-demanding of your time Selfish– not giving Intimidating- willfully scares Easily angered – not understanding Demanding- wants what they want when they want it Arrogant- thinks they are better than you Stubborn- not willing to compromise Forceful/Hurtful- does not respect you or your boundaries While this is not an extensive list, it gives you a good idea of the differences of a healthy vs. unhealthy relationship. Any relationship can go through a tough time. However, if you are in an unhealthy relationship that attacks your value and worth, there needs to be a change. If you are unmarried, you may need to put a hold on the relationship and seek counseling. If your partner is unwilling to see a counselor, you may need to move on. If you are married, you definitely need to seek counseling. Working on a relationship is not easy. Both partners need to be ready to work, make changes and grow into a more loving and solid relationship.
A collage of four women 's faces in black and white.

Age and Pregnancy: Should Women Be Concerned?

April 8, 2024
From teen pregnancy to advanced maternal age, pregnancy at any age can come with risks. We are often told that pregnancy in our teen years or over the age of 35 comes with possible increased risk to Mom and baby. But, what are those risks? Should a woman be concerned if she is a pregnant teenager or a woman over the age of 35? Teen pregnancy: Many of the risks of teen pregnancy tend to be socioeconomic risks. These risks include: Unplanned Pregnancy Lack of or inadequate prenatal care Lack of preparation for having a newborn Difficulty completing high school or going to college Being a single parent Lack of support or resources Many of these socioeconomic factors can be helped with good support from family or resources such as pregnancy resource centers. AbbaCare and other pregnancy resource centers can come alongside adolescent pregnant women and families to help ensure they are well-prepared and supported. Many pregnancy resource centers offer material support (diapers, wipes, formula, clothing, and other newborn supplies), parenting classes, childbirth classes, counseling, support groups, and mentor moms. There are some increased medical risks associated with adolescent pregnancy. These include an increased risk of pregnancy-induced high blood pressure, premature labor, low birth weight, and an increased risk of post-partum depression. These medical risks tend to decrease with adequate prenatal care and support throughout the pregnancy. Teens who are pregnant should immediately stop all drug, alcohol, and tobacco use. They should also get into prenatal care as soon as possible. Pregnancy over the age of 35 : Many women are told that if they are pregnant over the age of 35 they are considered high risk due to their age. Increased age can come with more risks but it is not guaranteed that any of those risks could happen. Here are some of the increased medical risks associated with pregnancy over the age of 35: Increased risk of twins or multiple gestation Increased risk of gestational diabetes Increased risk of developing high blood pressure during pregnancy Increased risk of premature birth or having a baby with a low birth weight Increased risk of C-Section Increased risk of chromosomal conditions such as Trisomy 21 (Down Syndrome), Trisomy 18, or Trisomy 13. Increased risk of miscarriage or pregnancy loss. What can women over the age of 35 do to decrease these risks? They can: Make a preconception appointment with an OB/GYN or get into prenatal care as soon as they find out about their pregnancy. Seek regular prenatal care Eat a healthy diet Gain weight wisely Get regular exercise Immediately stop any alcohol, drug or tobacco use. AbbaCare is a pregnancy resource center serving women and families facing pregnancies that are unexpected or unexpectedly difficult. To learn more about our free, confidential services, visit abbacare.org . Sources: Mayo Clinic Nationwide Children’s Web MD
A woman is standing in a field at sunset with her eyes closed.

Sexual Abuse and Abortion: Finding Healing in the Aftermath

March 10, 2024
There are many definitions of sexual assault; some broad and some narrow. This results in problems in reporting, both over reporting and under reporting. In their book, Rid of My Disgrace: Hope and Healing for Victims of Sexual Assault, Justin and Lindsey Holcomb define sexual assault as, “any type of sexual behavior or contact where consent is not freely given or obtained and is accomplished through force, intimidation, violence, coercion, manipulation, threat, deception, or abuse of authority.” The authors go on to say that, “This definition . . . expands the spectrum of actions to be considered sexual assault.” This expanded definition helps victims who need to have a clear understanding of what exactly sexual assault is. Understanding helps survivors to know several things: They are not alone If they have experienced sexual assault, it is a crime. They are not responsible for their assault There are services available that cater to their needs Statistics on sexual assault are disturbingly high. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) reports, “Over half of women and almost 1 in 3 men have experienced sexual violence involving physical contact during their lifetimes.” As you can see, sexual abuse is sadly a common experience, and one that cuts to the very being of a person. That is a difficult thing for us to think about, because behind the statistics are people. The reality is that more than likely someone you love has suffered from sexual assault. Perhaps you personally know the pain that comes from the violation of your will and body. What does it look like to live in the aftermath of such a horrible experience? For many, their lives are riddled with emotional, psychological, and/or physiological effects. Rid of my Disgrace offers an expansive list of effects, some are listed below,
A man and a woman are sitting at a table with a laptop.

Embracing Open Adoption

February 11, 2024
In the tight-knit community of Winchester, Virginia, where adoption discussions aren’t as common, it’s crucial to dive into the details of modern adoption. Many women here find that understanding the process can be life-changing, especially when facing challenges like drug use, unpreparedness for motherhood, or past involvement with social services. Breaking Myths : Let’s start by clearing up some misconceptions. Unlike the old, closed adoptions, today’s adoption is a personal and customizable experience. It’s not about “giving up” a baby but a woman making choices out of love and care. Understanding Choices : In modern adoption, a woman is in charge of her adoption plan. From picking adoptive parents to deciding on post-adoption contact and how things go at the hospital, it’s all in the hands of the expectant mother. Recognizing that these decisions take time, the agency is there to guide a woman through the process, making sure she understands all the available choices. Getting to Know Adoptive Parents : Today’s adoption process provides the chance for women to get to know prospective adoptive parents. Women in Winchester thinking about adoption can check out profiles of families from all over the U.S. Each family has its own story, interests, and jobs. Adoption coordinators will help a woman make family connections, ensuring she feels comfortable making this significant decision. Creating an Adoption Plan : After choosing an adoptive family, the next step is to create a personalized adoption plan. This plan covers various aspects, like outlining hospital procedures, sharing health history, and getting help with pregnancy-related expenses, per Virginia law. Delivery and Legal Steps : For a woman’s hospital stay, she will have already stated in her plan as to whether she would like the adoptive couple at the hospital as support. She will also have stated whether she wants to spend time with the baby in the hospital. All decisions during the hospital stay concerning her and her baby’s care are made by her. Typically, within a day or two, legal professionals will help with the necessary steps to complete the adoption, ensuring the birth mother fully understands the adoption process, her rights, and feels confident in her decision. Life After Adoption : Once the adoption is final, a new chapter begins for the birth mother. This could include staying in touch with the adoptive parents, as planned. Coordinators remain a supportive presence, offering help with future plans if needed. Many women who choose modern adoption feel proud of their decision and might even become peer counselors to support others on a similar journey. Whether a birth mother is already a parent or sees this as a chance for a fresh start, the support from coordinators helps shape a positive future based on the goals set early in the process.  Modern adoption reflects the resilience and love that steer the decisions of birth mothers. It’s about building lasting connections, ensuring a future enriched with love, understanding, and closeness for both the birth mother and the child. Modern adoption goes beyond being a mere process; it’s a journey marked by empowerment, choice, and a willingness to explore the potential for a brighter future!
A woman and two children are preparing food in a kitchen.

Family Food Prepping on a Single Income: Tips to Provide More by Spending Less

January 31, 2024
Is it possible to feed a large family on a single income without busting your budget? With a little creative planning, it is! Read on for tried and true tips from a mom of four. Shopping Where? The days of coupon cutting are over. Sure, you can find a good coupon deal every now and then, but for the most part where you shop will have more of an impact on your budget. Aldi is a great resource for budget friendly finds. They have a nice variety of kid approved prepackaged snacks that are easy on the wallet. Normally, anything that isn’t made from scratch is going to cost too much to justify the expense, but stores such as Aldi make it easier to say yes to that box of gummy bears they want to pack in their lunch. Sharp Shopper also has great deals on groceries, just be sure to check expiration dates for the freshest picks. Compare! Comparison shopping can save a lot of money, if you have the time to devote to it. Knowing the usual price of your particular pantry’s staples is key, if you are short on time. Save receipts and keep a list of those staples and prices for future reference. When the price of your favorite brand goes up, it may be time to switch to another brand that’s more affordable Look there! Always, always, always look for the sticker that tells you the unit price on an item. The lower the unit price, the better the deal, and if you have a lot of mouths to feed, a better deal matters! Cooking Being an “ingredients household” may mean the kids can’t grab a snack instead of waiting for dinner to be served, but that will help your finances, and their appetites, in the long run. Here’s another example of how investing a little time can save you some dough (the spendable kind): Meal planning and prep. Meals fully cooked from scratch are going to yield you the biggest savings. This usually requires the largest time commitment. Resources like the Passionate Penny Pincher can help you learn how to prep enough freezer meals in two hours to last for 2 weeks! Planning ahead is key. If you have a wide range of ages to feed, include things like pasta or sweet potatoes that are appropriate for toddlers to teens. Rice, beans, and ground meat are other basic foods that can be simplified or seasoned up for various ages and preferences. These double as some of the best use of your grocery dollars, as well. It’s tempting to try and please everyone at your table with every meal. As a mother of a particularly picky child, I get it. A good rule of thumb is to plan and prepare the most nutritious, affordable foods you can. There may be a learning curve, especially if you are used to convenience foods, but with some time you just might find you and your children prefer simple home-cooked meals. Not all of these changes have to happen overnight, but you can start with a single step to save money and provide nutritious meals for you and your family! Set achievable goals at a pace that works for you and have fun saving! AbbaCare is a pregnancy resource center serving Winchester Virginia, Martinsburg West Virginia, and the Northern Shenandoah Valley. To learn more about our free and confidential services, visit our website today.
A woman is sitting at a desk using a calculator.

Holiday Planning on Any Budget

December 10, 2023
It seems that every year the holiday season comes a little quicker than the previous year, taking us by surprise when it’s mid-November and we don’t have a plan for our holiday spending. Sound familiar? Don’t fret, Christmas can be a memorable holiday regardless of how little or how much you spend. But, if you want to look into holiday budgeting this season, read below for ways to start saving now! TRAVELING The holidays are a time when many people travel out of town to visit loved ones. Some easy ways to save money are to buy travel tickets in advance, drive your own vehicle, use public transportation and travel during the “off-season.” You can often save money by staying with friends and family or even finding a rental home big enough to split the cost with others who are traveling as well. If flying is the only option, check out this resource on how to make the most out of booking airlines and saving money: https://www.gobankingrates.com/saving-money/travel/how-to-travel-for-cheap-around-christmas/ HOSTING Christmastime is often a season of gatherings, usually involving food, decor and activities. Maybe you are the one hosting everyone this year and you are looking for ways not to break the bank while also making Christmas beautiful for your loved ones. If that’s the case, and you want your holiday decorations to stand out, look for creative new ways you can re-use your decor or even find some DIY ideas that you can also turn into group activities. One of the best ways to save money is to have people pitch in! Whether that means you ask your guests to bring food, plan activities, or just have people help you put it all together, allow others to help you, if they are able! There are so many free group games and activities you can find online that are a really fun way to bring people together, and there’s nothing wrong with keeping things simple and small scale. GIFT GIVING One of the easiest ways to go overboard with holiday spending is with gifts! But, if you’re trying to stick to a budget, this is a great opportunity to plan ahead and might even lead to some creative, money-saving ideas. First, you could simply decide what your budget is and divide that accordingly, or just decide to stay under a certain amount for whomever you want to buy gifts for. You could take things a step further and work something out with family members and decide to do something like a “Secret Santa” gift exchange, so you’re only buying gifts for one person. A fun way to save money and have a personal touch is to give handmade gifts , and if you start this year, you can start saving bags and boxes to recycle the gift-wrapping to use again! There are many creative ways to save money and these are just a few ideas to get you started! Figure out where you want to spend the majority of your time and energy, then, budget accordingly. Have fun saving and giving this holiday season! AbbaCare is a nonprofit Pregnancy Resource Center currently serving in the Winchester, VA and Martinsburg, WV areas. Please contact us to schedule a free and confidential consultation appointment today.
A pregnant woman is leaning against a wall and holding her belly.

We’re pregnant, now what? “He wants an abortion, she doesn’t.”

October 29, 2023
Scenario 2: The father wants an abortion but the mother doesn’t. Now let’s talk about what it looks like when the roles are reversed. A woman finds out that she is pregnant and quickly learns that she and her partner are not on the same page. She wants to continue the pregnancy but her partner wants to terminate. Immediately, a woman may be feeling unable to continue alone, unsupported or unloved by her partner, and powerless in this situation. She may feel hopeless-but there is still hope! With the right support and resources, like those provided by AbbaCare, women can be empowered to embrace their pregnancy with confidence. A woman should start by informing herself and her partner with the facts, and even if there is resistance, share their thoughts with their partner! Show them the pictures, the heartbeat, and encourage them to see things from your perspective. If that feels scary, here at AbbaCare we have a men’s coaching program where men are equipped to walk alongside the father of the baby and encourage them. There is hope! Even if the father decides to leave in this situation, a woman should still feel empowered to move forward in her pregnancy. By providing material assistance, classes, and referrals to local medical and maternity resources, AbbaCare is ready to face this challenge alongside these women. Just know, the father of the baby has no legal right to make a woman abort her pregnancy, and if a mother is experiencing any type of abusive behavior from their partner, a way out is possible. Local shelters such as The Laurel Center provide safe housing and educational resources to women and their children fleeing an abusive home situation. Abortion regret is real, and oftentimes mothers suffer psychologically, physically, or both. If a woman is facing an unplanned pregnancy, we are here to help. Come Together Ultimately, what it takes to tackle these divisive problems is to come together and talk about it. Parents should feel empowered to share their fears and thoughts. Every relationship is different from their experiences, to financial stability, family dynamics and housing issues. Sometimes pregnancy decisions are not the only issues people are facing; it can be daunting to face an unplanned pregnancy when dealing with several other stressors. At AbbaCare, we want parents to know they can receive support not only from us, but also from many other local organizations who are equipped to help families just like them. In the midst of a life-changing situation, it is important to slow down, breathe, be informed and find hope. AbbaCare is a pregnancy resource center serving women, men, and families facing unexpected pregnancies. To learn more about our free, confidential services, visit abbacare.org .
A man and a woman are sitting on a bench talking on their cell phones.

We’re pregnant, now what? “She wants an abortion, he doesn’t.”

October 29, 2023
“How did this happen?” “How do I tell my partner?” “I can’t handle a child.” “What do I do next?” A positive pregnancy test result from an unplanned pregnancy can produce questions like the ones above. The expectant mother may be overwhelmed with uncertainty and disbelief. The problems she sees are big, and they seem even bigger when the father of the baby isn’t on the same page. What does it look like when a mother desires to carry a pregnancy to term but the father of the baby doesn’t, and vice versa? How can couples come together on this issue? What does the law say about this? What resources are available during this time of crisis? Before making a pregnancy decision, it is vital to confirm several things about pregnancy. A woman needs to confirm the pregnancy location (in the uterus or not), viability (capable of continued life and growth), and the estimated gestational age of the baby. An ultrasound can determine all of this information. Scenario 1: The mother wants an abortion but the father of the baby doesn’t. What can be done if the woman has decided to have an abortion, but her partner wants her to have the baby? After getting the answers, and following the process above, the woman is now educated and informed, ready to make a decision. Ideally, she and the father will discuss the information together, and share their feelings about each option. Even though they are on different pages, it is important to see it from every angle, know legal rights and ultimately make a decision. If possible, the couple should make the choice together, but according to Family Law Rights it is the sole legal obligation of the pregnant woman to make this decision, and a father’s consent is not required. “Should a male’s pregnant partner wish to seek an abortion, the male’s consent is not required by law. A woman may make the choice to terminate a pregnancy, even if the alleged father objects to the procedure. The reasoning behind this is twofold, based on the woman’s right to medical privacy and the fact of the female body being more directly affected by the pregnancy. During the Supreme Court Case of Planned Parenthood vs. Danforth , the court ruled that requiring a father’s consent to having an abortion was unconstitutional since a male’s refusal would essentially veto the woman’s right to choose.” Problem solved, right? Not necessarily. While it may provide relief to know that the law is on the side of the woman carrying the child, there is still an immense responsibility in making that decision. So how does anyone considering all of the options decide? They seek council. By talking to other women who have made the choice to carry or to terminate their pregnancy, families can find support and the resources they need to make an educated and informed decision. There is no need to feel rushed or pressured. It is especially important for them to talk to their partner and find out why they want this child, how they want to support this baby, and how they can work together to make a decision. Here at AbbaCare we are here to provide material and educational resources, and most of all love and support for the women and men that walk through our doors and are facing a tough pregnancy decision. Across the nation, Pregnancy Resource Centers just like AbbaCare provide free pregnancy testing, free ultrasounds, free STI/STD testing, and many other free resources to the women and families in their community with the goal of empowering women and families to make informed decisions. For women who do obtain an abortion, AbbaCare provides anonymous abortion recovery through our Past Abortion Care and Encouragement ( PACE ) program. If you, or someone you know, is struggling with a past abortion experience, there is hope and healing. Reach out today. Visit our next blog, Scenario 2 “The father wants an abortion but the mother doesn’t.” AbbaCare is a pregnancy resource center serving women, men, and families facing unexpected pregnancies. To learn more about our free, confidential services, visit abbacare.org .
More Posts
Share by: